Today's Headlines

"Five-Star General Dawn" Earns Her Stripes! 💫 💫 💫 💫 💫

Our beloved patient is handing out military promotions like candy! When asked to rate her new OT therapist Dawn, Mom insisted on upgrading her from "5 stars" to "5-Star General." (We're still trying to figure out if this means Dawn needs to wear those fancy shoulder badges now... 🤔) Her PT guy is just hoping for a minimum of a 1 star. 🤣

The Great Phone Caper of 2024! 🕵️‍♀️

In a moment of high drama, our star patient nearly called... wait for it... 119! No, 911! Or was it 411? (looking for her phone!)

• Breaking Update: Phone located!

• Suspect identified: Hondo (aka The Innocent Phone Borrower)

• Case Status: SOLVED!

• Emergency services: Thankfully not needed!

Virtual Family Reunion Causes Face Muscles to Work Overtime! 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦

Tonight we surprised mom with a FaceTime extravaganza that had her grinning so wide we worried she might need another surgery! (Just kidding, doctors, please don't get any ideas! 😅)

Editor's Note: We have photographic evidence of said happiness, but we choose life and therefore will NOT be posting any photos without proper hair preparation. We repeat: WE CHOOSE LIFE! 💇‍♀️

Progress Report: 📈

• Hurdles jumped: 0

• Smiles given: Approximately 1,000

• Spirits: Through the roof!

• Phone location: Known

• Hair status: TBD

Coming Up Next...

Stay tuned for tomorrow's episode where we hope to uncover the mysterious "Rehab Timeline"! Will it be days? Weeks? Years? (Just kidding on that last one, Mom! 😘)

Until then, keep those prayers coming! They're working better than Mom's memory of emergency phone numbers! 🙏

With love and laughter, Your Faithful Recovery Reporter (Who is definitely NOT posting any unprofessional hair photos... ever... because survival instincts are strong! 💪)

P.S. If anyone needs to reach Mom, her phone is now safely back in her possession... we think! 😉